Potty Humor

This morning as I was collecting laundry, I passed Z-boy in the bathroom.

With the door open.

Because my children are heathens.

It’s something we need to work on, I know. I’ll never forget TheWiseOne’s first day of kindergarten. Parents were invited to stay with the children for part of the day. And after a successful morning with my happy 6-year-old, we all lined up to take our children home. And like most kindergartners with small bladders, TheWiseOne had to potty.

TheWiseOne prefers that I spare you the details, but let me just say this: bathroom by classroom exit+kindergartner who doesn’t know to close the door=FULL MOON. Best first impression. EVER.

They laughed. I blushed and berated myself for not teaching my child something as simple as closing the bathroom door!

3 years later, they still don’t close the door. I’d like to think that it’s not related to my failure as a parent and more related to the fact that they are boys. And boys are slobs. *shrugs*

Anyway, as I pass Z-boy using the bathroom with the door open (as if doors don’t exist), I call out, “Don’t forget to flush and wash your hands!”

Because, yes, if I don’t tell him this, he may not actually do it. Because he’s a boy.

And Z-boy, being the clever boy he is, replies–midstream–that he’s already flushed and washed his hands. I then watch him smile smugly, yank his pants up, and proceed down the hallway with a cocky swagger that screams, “Mom is so stuuuupid!”


“Flush and wash your hands, Z-boy!” I call again with a tone of annoyance that all moms should be able to identify with.

Z-boy: “Awwww! How did you know?”

Then I smiled smugly.


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